7 Aspects of Love (Jean Vanier)

These are summarised from Jean Vanier's "Becoming Human" about his work with mentally-handicapped patients, but it seems relevant for us all, for dealing with any hurt which we or others might face. 
More detailed extracts may be read at the link below. 
http://xuanwuting.wordpress.com/2014/04/03/love-can-transform-the-severely-hurt-heart/

7 Aspects of Love

1. to reveal (beauty & recognise value, being present, love)

2. to understand (desires, needs, underlying conditioning)

3. to communicate (naming things & feeling with body, heart)

4. to celebrate (play & feel joy)

5. to empower (responsibility, respect, freedom to grow)

6. to be in communion (trust, letting down barriers, letting go of the need to control)

7. to forgive (acceptance, prayer, centred in love, inner voice, finding God, softness of heart, self-love, service, life meaning)

One sentence from the link which struck me as particularly insightful: "Claudia lived a horrible form of madness which should not be idealized or seen as a gateway to another world." Self-acceptance does not mean idealising the present and refusing to see the possibility or desirability of change. When in the grips of a madness, an addiction, a prejudice, or even a depression, these feelings are not “real just because we feel them”, yet they are real for us now. That is precisely why we, and society as a whole, needs to recognise why? and help inspire the change to grow & get beyond them.

Painting: 'The Lovers' by the impressionist Henri Martin